My Ride

I wanted trust, Which wasn't there.
I longed for it, But they just didn’t care.
Such indifference, I thought was rare.
But what I thought, They'd never care.

I wanted to show I could pull it off
And back I got a cynical laugh
I laughed back and went ahead
Only to find, a motive dead.

I look back now, Time and again
All those hopes, That died in vain
Still hurt me where it hurts most
Still makes me feel what I lost.

I stare at the ceiling thinking every night
All that's happened, was it right?
Should I be thinking about giving now?
Or for selfish desires should I fight ?

I really want now to just rise back
To get the powers that I'd once lack
To throw my flaws rather than hide
To guide my ride on a dreamy tide.